Balancing Act.....

How do you equally balance what is important to you???

That is the question that runs through my mind every.single.day.

I find it hard to balance being a mother, wife, friend, daughter, sister and not lose myself in the mean time. Is it even possible to juggle it all?

Since becoming a mother three and a half years ago, Marleigh had been my number 1 priority ALWAYS. She is always number 1.. before my husband.. before my dreams.. before EVERYTHING. And now that 2 other rugrats have come along and take up 120 percent of my time 7 days a week, sometimes its easy to forget that I am also a wife. Maybe its because the little time Aaron and I do spend together is also with the kids in tow, so we chit chat while we are feeding, changing entertaining the kidlets. But we rarely get alone time.. unless we are sleeping..

All I can hope is that as the kids get older and become more independent we will have more time to connect with eachother on a more 'couple' level. But right now its easy to forget that we were once crazy about eachother.

Lately, I catch my reflection in a mirror and cant help but think outloud... 'WHO ARE YOU???'

I feel almost unrecognizable to myself, with the twin pregnancy I gained almost 40 pounds! *YIKES*, my once makeup covered face is replaced with bags under my eyes, frown lines and neglected eyebrows... Iam only 25 but I know *and feel* that having these twins and a 3 and a half year old is aging me very rapidly. I havent found my first grey hair yet.. but I know that nasty little bugger is gonna poke up any day now... And Im gonna blame  .. DORA!.. yes!.. DORA... and you too boots.. if I have to hear.. ' Dora dora dora the explorer.. grab your backpack lets go..." Im gonna lose my shit!!!!!

Oh boy do I miss playing with my makeup.... my favorite past time... I could sit forever in front of a mirror trying new products or application techniques. But I havent had time for that in MONTHS.. atleast since we moved to Calgary from Ontario in January. I miss it so much!! If Im lucky I put makeup on once every few weeks. Even if Im going out to the store *I used to happily put on a full face of makeup to go to walmart* I now just simply dont have time to apply it in the midst of putting two babies in carseats, making sure I have packed enough wipes, diapers, bottles, a snack and drink for the oldest and dont forget the list!

Its a miracle I remember to brush my teeth everyday.....

Im not sure if its possible to balance family and friends and relationships and dreams at this point... currently the kids are rotting my brain. Hopefully I recover soon....